Heather and her Daughter (age 10)

Heather’s Story:

“Stay in school. Because, I didn’t really get a good education because I grew up in a poor family, I was never really taught how to get where you’re supposed to be, you know what I mean? So I relied on just menial work, um, bar tending, things like that… and relationships. And relationships don’t always last. If you can’t take care of yourself, it’s tough, especially when you have kids of your own. The cycle just continues. That’s basically what happened to us. I wasn’t working, and we lost our apartment. And I don’t have child care, and the school year is over. And we’re not in a shelter that has cooking facilities (they’re about to close) so we’re going to have to go back up to the Grand Concourse, which is like a communal. It’s one big room, and everybody’s in it. That’s basically it. I lived in a squat down on 11^th Street, pretty much my whole life, since I’m like 19. And, that’s where we lived. It was ours, but I moved in with him, had her [her daughter], and he met someone new, who had an education and a job. I don’t blame him.

The shelter is okay, but like I said, you can’t eat there. That’s why they’re closing it; they have to redo the whole thing. And it’s in Queens, so I have to come here [Manhattan] every day for school, because she’s over here for school, and I don’t want to take her out, because my hopes are that we’re gonna be back here. Like, I don’t know what’s gonna happen from one day to the next. The sense of insecurity, it sucks. I get really overwhelmed because I feel like it’s gonna happen to her too. And she’s so young. Like, I can’t stress enough to her… she says ‘Mom, I don’t like math,’ but I tell her, ‘you have to,’ you know?”

When asked about her favorite school subject, Heather’s daughter replied “reading.” She then showed me the book she’s currently reading, The Double Daring Book for Girls. Heather remarked, “How to be President is in here!”

When asked about the happiest moment in her life, Heather replied that she couldn’t recall a happy memory, since it had been so long, so she asked her 10 year old daughter. Her daughter simply smiled, hugged her mother, and said “you” as she pointed to Heather.

When asked what she wants other people to understand about being homeless:

“You’re judged. You’re not held to the same standards as every other human. I’ve been spit on. Police called on me, for doing nothing. I’m a good person. It’s because I have a kid. I don’t want to be on welfare. I don’t want to be on food stamps. I want to be in school. I want her in all kinds of activities, you know? Yeah, people judge you. It’s not fair. You’re either at the bottom or at the top here, there’s no in between.”

On Others’ Stories:

“Well, it seems like everybody’s got some kind of a story, whether you’re rich or poor, everybody’s got a story. When I was a teenager, I was friends with this really rich girl, and she committed suicide. But, everybody that was friends with her just used her. You know what I mean? They used her for a ride in the Jaguar, they used her for money, they used her for nights out. And when she killed herself, everybody said, ‘how selfish. Like, she had everything. She had both of her parents, she lived in a beautiful house, she had everything she wanted. What could she possibly… it’s just so selfish!’ But, because I was close with her… her father was molesting her, her whole life. That’s why he gave her the Jaguar, that’s why he gave her the money. You know, like, people just look at the surface of everything, but nobody ever wants to get in. They just want for themselves. It’s a shame. That’s why I tell her, like, just because some of these people that walk by, like, they might spit at you, they might say nasty things, they might judge me, but you can’t judge people. Don’t hate them because they have money and you don’t. You know? Because everybody’s got a story, and you never know where it’s gonna take you one day.”